How I’m Developing the Ability to Calm My Hot Head

How I’m Developing the Ability to Calm My Hot Head

Written by sarahone, In Health, Published On
January 6, 2024

It is a little humiliating to confess, but I constantly battle with my hot head, my fury. I write about my anxiety frequently because I’m a very nervous person, and my anxiety frequently takes the form of rage.

I make an effort not to show my anger to other people, but it’s a difficult emotion to control. I’m trying to find some strategies to calm myself down since I’m upset about spending time and energy being so irrational.

I have a hothead personality Due to my stress and anxiety

There have been moments when the tension and anxiety I carry about from my job have been overwhelming. Over the past several months, I’ve become very angry as a result. I’ve stayed away from people and cancelled work. Eventually, being a hothead started to affect other aspects of my life as well.

Another crucial piece of information is the fact that I’m not a people person. I become irritated easily, and being around people can give me anxiety attacks. I can easily become irrationally furious and unpleasant to be around other people.

In addition, I become upset because I get offended easily. Compared to many of the individuals around me, I hold extremely different opinions and values. People aren’t even sure what not to say because I’m not usually really forward about it. It’s difficult not to feel uncomfortable and alone.

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My Family and My Hot Head

My family suffers the most from my rage, which makes me feel bad. I don’t yell or get aggressive, but my tone and pessimism can definitely create tension in a room. Even though I feel horrible every time, it still happens.

When someone says something carelessly or with apparent malice, my anger flares up, and I become furious like a phoenix rising from the ashes of miscommunication.

The electricity of panic crackles around deadlines, which resemble thunderclouds and make every minute of the clock feel like a cruel drumbeat.

I promise you, it’s not a pretty sight. My temple vein turns into a pulsating lighthouse of my inner agony. Normally, I can speak in a whisper, but now my voice has a sharp edge, every word laced with fury and the urgent need to be understood.

I don’t want to be this person. This firebrand, prone to igniting spontaneously, feels like an alien covering me.

Three Strategies I Use to Handle Anger

Taking a rest: I simply need a break sometimes. Anger is a draining feeling. Although I normally feel horrible about missing work, there are benefits to taking time off. Sometimes, all I need to relax and concentrate is some quiet time for myself.

I am aware of meditation: Though I talk about my mala beads a lot, they have truly changed my life. Finding non-medication methods to manage my mental illness symptoms has always been difficult for me, but being a working mother puts a lot of stress on me, so I had to find a way to decompress.

Mala beads are easy to make. The string has 108 beads on it. Simply touch each bead while repeating or chanting a mantra or affirmation. Every day, I wear my beads as a bracelet by wrapping them around my wrist. Then, they’re at my disposal whenever I need them. Mala beads are often associated with prayer, but this is not necessary.

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I only use them for meditation because I’m not spiritual. They are quite soothing to me. They assist me in refocusing my thoughts, which has never been an easy feat for me.

Weeping: I weep when my anger becomes too great. When it comes to that, I detest it, but the release is just fantastic. Afterwards, my mind always clears.

I detest being angry. I don’t want to aggravate my neighbours or relatives. More than ever, I am conscious of my wrath, and I’m trying to comprehend it better. I am appreciative of the coping mechanisms I possess and will never stop searching for more.

My Hot Head Due to my stress and anxiety

It feels like there’s a pressure cooker within my skull, full of constant tension that could explode at the least provocation. It’s a low, persistent hum that may quickly intensify into a loud hiss, not a steady roar, mind you.

This, my friends, is the price I pay for having a hot head, a burning byproduct of the tension and anxiety that is always rising inside of me.

It shows up in seemingly insignificant but quite annoying ways. A fork dropped results in a cascade of clanging disappointment, hunching my shoulders and clamping my mouth like a rusty vice.

Managing My Stress-Induced Explosions

There are many different and erratic triggers. A thoughtless remark from a coworker, an endless traffic bottleneck, or an unexpected bill requiring fast payment can all be the spark that lights a match in my emotional fuse box.

Sometimes, the heat builds up slowly, like a slow burn, until I’m boiling over with my irritation at the smallest provocation. At other times, it’s a private treatment explosion, a quick outburst of rage that leaves me feeling humiliated and burnt.

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The fallout is a wasteland of fatigue and sorrow. The harsh words I said hang in the air like ghosts of my angry outburst circling us.

I tend to my wounds, enduring the agony of broken relationships and the sting of self-blame. I know deep down that the heat in my head is a burden I have to learn to handle and manage rather than something that is the fault of the outside world.


The path is difficult; it is paved with mindfulness exercises, self-compassion, and candid conversation. It’s about stepping back from the fire and trying to find a calmer viewpoint, as well as identifying the triggers before they catch fire. It’s about admitting my frailties and asking for assistance when the flames get too close.

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